Quick question: can you remember the happiest moment(s) of your life?
Mine was as incredible as it was short-lived: in the misty sunrise of the mind, as I woke from a beautiful dream, and could suspend belief in reality, I was truly happy.
And then I opened my eyes.
I thought I was a pretty happy individual overall - and indeed I was, for ignorance is bliss. Emotional ignorance, that is.
I know, and you know, that willful ignorance is just a bad idea in general, but in terms of emotion, it'd be a a lie to say that it's all my fault.
To have found a kindred spirit in the Breathing Stone is an underrated blessing, and while grateful beyond words, I am guarded by fear. Fear of judgement. Fear of vulnerability. Fear of losing control. Fear that if I share even a smidgen of my soul, my heart will be bound. And yet, somehow, I doubt that this feeling is unknown to the average clump of brain cells.
The pain of the present shadows the joys of the past, dulls the promise of the future, and contrasts harshly with the few bright stars that attempt to guide me to a safe haven until this turmoil comes to rest. Music is but a meager escape, for on my own I am nothing.
No comments:
Post a Comment