Attachment

I remember when I was a child, someone somewhere got me a Tamagotchi electronic pet.
I remember wanting to take care of it.
I remember that my aunt saw it and threw it away calling it "a devilish influence".
I remember crying.

I remember my brother deleting my entire music collection of about fifty songs in the late 90s. He will never appreciate how bad that hurt me.

I remember feeling the shock in my chest when I found out that Ellie died in 2013, even though I barely knew her.
She was a wonderful person.

I remember nearly getting my friend and I killed while taking an unauthorized U-turn on a major highway in Goa.

I remember Chenoa hugging me hard in 2015 and me wishing she would never let go.

I remember first seeing Hemangi when I arrived in Mumbai and subconsciously praying to see her again even though I don't pray.

I remember, I remember.

I remember, when I was growing up, never feeling comfortable sleeping unless I was holding on to at least two, maybe three, more pillows than I actually needed.

I wish I could forget.
I wish I could remember what I've already forgotten.

But most of all -

I wish ... I wish I know how to not care.